Relationships,hormones and hurt feelings

Well...things with Jim and i are really going very well. He's been pretty supportive with everything that is going on. i've been bugging him like crazy since i am home all day....24 hours ....1440 minutes.....864000 seconds a day. Think i am going stir crazy? Yup yup i am. I do go back to work on Monday though so that is a good thing. It will help with the lonliness and bordeom and it will help with the fact that i am poorer than a church mouse too.

i am hormonal today. i hate being hormonal! It means that i am way to sensitive, why to likely to break down in tears because someone dared to look at me wrong....way way way to fragile. It's frankly annoying. Argh!

When i start back to work i start back full time plus plus plus because i am moving in a month and the movers won't move me cause i am cute....even though i am! Teee hehehehe

For once i am not really in a writing mood. Odd isn't it?

Well regardless....i need to say what's going on with Jim. He hurt my feeling really badly earlier in the week because he dared to need some alone time. Pfttttttttt on alone time sheesh. i cried...and cried...was miserable...was difficult....poor deb! So then Wednesday night he asked me how i was...i told him i was okay...he says he wonders if i am ready for a relationship right now since i am going through so much with health and stuff.

Now....i know it doesn't sound sweet and loving when i type it...but it totally was the way he said it. He wants me to be happy and he's worried that starting a new relationship is too much on top of everything else.

I have to say...it was a reality check for me. Satan has been dumping all kinds of crap on me here lately...and God has been performing miracles that counteract and then providing me even more wonderful things.

My outlook here lately has been sucking! I knew pretty quickly that God brought Jim into my life because i needed his steady outlook...his ability to say what is at the heart of the matter...his perspective...his humor...i could go on but you get the idea.

I was so close to loosing that gift because i was not looking at what i've been given that is postive and uplifting...i was woe is me'ing.

So i sat myself down and gave myself one of those talks we all hate to have with ourselves...and now today i saw a good effects...i am not so clingy...not so needy...apprieciative of what i have instead of constantly wanting more more more. I am still lonely...i am still bored...however i with a willing spirit found ways to occupy the time i had occupied previously by the bad attitude.

Woo hoo...i love this being an adult thing...at 29 i would hope so eh?